Negativity Test For Parents

13 Jun

Okay this is probably going to sound like a strange thing to ask you to do but it will really help you to become aware of how often you speak in a negative way to your child.

The Negative Test

Choose a time when you are going to be with your child for a set amount of time.  It can be an hour, an afternoon or a whole day.  I recommend an hour the first time you do this test.

Get a small notebook and pen that you can carry around with you.

The add a mark  on your notebook every time you say something negative.

Negative words ~ No, Don’t, Stop…

Stop pushing…

Stop shouting

Don’t do that

Don’t pick your nose

Don’t spill your drink

No, you can’t..

Stop that

These are just a few of the negative examples you might find yourself saying.  If you do, it’s fine.  You’re now becoming aware and you can make changes once you are aware.

"Yes And No Options" by digitalart

“Yes And No Options” by digitalart

Each time you make a negative mark in your book try to think of and say a positive.

By the way, the first time I did this exercise I gave up after half an hour as I was so shocked at how many negative words I used with my son.

 

Give it a go and let me know how you get on.

Happy Parenting

Wendy

If you would like support in learning how to use the law of attraction to be a more positive, happier parent please take a look at my Parenting Pages 

Are you focusing on what’s great about your child?

5 Jun

Last weeks post was about focusing on what’s great about your child.  I’ve been adding comments to the post all week, which you can read here and I’d love you to share your own thoughts or what it is you think is great about your child.

In my comments I focused on things from each day to be grateful for and that I think are great about my son.

Here’s an example:

Day 4 ~ Today I am so grateful that my son helped me with jobs around the house, got his school things ready and enjoyed playing games with me and granny.

See more of my Gratitude Comments

I asked you to write down about three things that you liked/loved/were grateful for… connected with your child.   This daily exercise goes a long way to helping you stay focused on positives.

Believe me I have days when I feel like pulling my hair out and my son is driving me absolutely crazy.  Even on these days I make sure that I spend time focusing on positives connected to my child otherwise I end up focusing on what’s driving me mad.

The law of attraction brings to us whatever we focus on the most.

This week I’d like you to carry on focusing on daily things that are positive connected to your children, I also want you to make a list of thing you love about your child in general.

I’ve shared the first 20 things from my list about  my own son below.  When I first started this list I struggled to get to 10 things but now I have over a hundred things on the list.  The more you focus on what you like/love about your child the more you will begin to notice him/her doing things you like.

"Girl And Boy With Gift Box" by Sicha Pongjivanich

“Girl And Boy With Gift Box” by Sicha Pongjivanich

My Own List of Things I like/Love About My Son 

His smile

His eyes

His freckles

His dimples

He loves reading

He loves films

He loves learning about how his favourite films were made

His imagination

His determination

His hugs

His kisses

His laugh

His energy

His ability to voice his opinions

His manners

His love of family

His love of animals

I love that he will go up to a complete stranger and confidently ask if he is allowed to stroke their dog

His love of Lego

His creativity

A couple of years ago I was fortunate enough to be introduced to Dr Katrin Bain .  Katrin has produced a series of Parenting Pocket Books which I highly recommend.  However the one I most recommend is her PocketRescue Tantrums: A Parent Guide to Child Behavior for the Toddler Years and Beyond Don’t be put off by the front cover if you have older children.  I still carry a copy of this book around with me and my son is 11 now.  There’s an area where you can write in those things you love about your child and a dd a photo.

I tend to collect my son from school and if I’ve had a full on day at work, I will sit and read this little book which does wonders to help me make the shift from Wendy Tomlinson Law of attraction Coach to  a Mum who’s present.  I also take out this book at times when my son does drive me up the way (it happens).  This helps me focus on what I like and then I’m more positive when I speak with him afterwards.

I’d love you to share your thoughts and your own list.  Just click  on the comment button.

Happy Parenting

Wendy x

 

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Focus On What’s Great About Your Child

30 May

Okay this is an INTERACTIVE BLOG POST.  I’m really hoping this will work and you’ll join in.

As aLaw of Attraction Coach I teach my clients to focus on what they want.  I talk about this in my blog post Does Your Child Know What You Want? which is so important when parenting using the law of attraction.  Once you are clear about what you want, share it with your child and the Universe.

Let’s a assume you have done this step and continue to practice this positive parenting with the law of attraction key step. Now I want you to focus on GRATITUDE.

Gratitude Is A Super Charged Power EMOTION

The more time we spend FEELING gratitude in our life and as parents, the easier it becomes to naturally attract the things we want.  Now as a LOA (law of attraction) parent this is something you’ll really want to get into the habit of doing.

FEEL GRATITUDE AS MUCH OF THE TIME AS POSSIBLE.  Always be on the look out for things to be grateful for, as this will really help to raise your vibrations and attract what you want.

Here’s where it gets interactive.

I want you to practice being grateful for things connected to your child in a specific way and I want you please to share with us below. By sharing you help yourself, your child and everyone else who takes part.

Positive vibrations attract positive things into your life

Negative vibrations attract negative things into your life

Being grateful is a really easy way for you to keep raising your vibrations.  It’s one of the best daily habits I can recommend to you.

What to do:

  • Click on comments (to the left of this blog post title)
  • Share three things that you are grateful for about your child specific to today.  For example: I am grateful that my child was so polite when he was introduced to someone he’d not met before. I’m grateful that my child ate a healthy meal tonight and sat really well at the table.  I’m grateful that my child tidied up all his toys at bedtime without being asked.
  • This exercise makes you focus on what is happening that is positive today.
  • I know your time is precious but for this to be really amazing please come back every day for 7 days (more if you want to) and share three things every day.

Please join in and ask your parenting friends to do the same.  I’m really excited to see how this works.

Happy LOA Parenting

Wendy

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5 Ways to Make Your Family Vacation Healthier and Happier this Summer

22 May

5 Ways to Make Your Family Vacation Healthier and Happier this Summer by Kendra Thornton

Kendra Thornton

Kendra Thornton

Traveling is what you make it when you’ve got kids along for the ride. I have learned this again and again throughout the years, sometimes ending up with great adventures and wonderful stories and sometimes ending up with family trips that we all wish we could forget. Without overdoing it, it’s worth a bit of preparation to make family vacations much more pleasurable for everyone.

Tip 1: It’s the Journey That Counts – Stop and Have Fun!

Kids and toddlers love to explore, so I try to set aside the logical need to get from point A to point B and just let them be the little adventurers they are. Enjoying the journey is something we busy adults could stand to do more often, so why not take advantage of the little trails near the rest stops, the gift shops in the airports, or even just take a walk to stop and smell the roses?

Tip 2: Breakfast – Even More Important While Vacationing

Before heading out to the theme park or other destination of the day, I always make sure that everyone is well fed. I know that if they (and I) start out with a full belly of healthy food, then moods will stay lifted for a while, they’ll have plenty of steam to keep them going, and I have the peace of mind in knowing that at least one meal of the day was a healthy one!

Orlando

Orlando

Most Orlando hotels are geared for offering family-friendly hotel packages as well. Aside from them being great with the continental breakfasts – they also offer a quiet hours policy at night which is key!

Tip 3: Avoid Sweet Tooth Attacks!

With a little bit of planning, I avoid overspending on junk food when the kids start to get antsy from hunger. Sliced fruit, pretzels, string cheese, or trail mix in my bag are a great comfort to me when I hear their irritated hunger sounds start. Well worth the prep time! I even throw in a few cookies, as they are much cheaper than the ones out of the vending machine.

Tip 4: Hand Washing Helps

It’s no fun coming home from an awesome vacation and immediately getting sick! My kids know to wash their hands regularly and with the proper method while on a trip (and at home). We also carry hand sanitizer and use it often. According to one SCA survey, four out of ten adults don’t wash their hands after blowing their nose, coughing or sneezing, and 58 percent have seen people leaving public restrooms without washing their hands. Not us!

Tip 5: Active Rest Stops

The kids have to sit a lot while traveling, so I always bring active toys to get them moving while taking a driving break or waiting for a flight. A jump rope, ball, and Frisbee are all fun, easy ways to get the kids active and interact with them more while traveling. They rest better afterwards too!

All in all, by taking a little extra time to prepare, a family summer vacation can be a lot more fun when the kids (and mom) are healthy and happy.

 

Kendra Thornton: Travel advocate, TV spokesperson, PR businesswoman, proud wife and mama of 3. I am a long time travel expert who has been packing my bags and traveling the world since I was 3 months old! I’ve found my utmost desire in life is right here in my own home. I have mixed my excitement for travel by bringing the taste of authentic cuisine to my own home with some of my unique recipes and sharing some of my personal traveling tips. Enjoy!

Twitter: 
https://twitter.com/KendraThornton

Website: 
http://www.thorntonpr.com/

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Reader’s Question ~ What is the best way to teach my child how to use the law of attraction?

15 May
"Girl Laying On Grass Field" by photostock

“Girl Laying On Grass Field” by photostock

Thank you to Sarah for this question.

Sarah asked “What is the best way to teach my child how to use the law of attraction?”

The very best way to teach your child how to use the law of attraction is to create what I call a law of attraction lifestyle for yourself and let your child experience you using it as a natural part of life.

I believe children always learn the best by watching and copying.  You can of course back this up using lots of positive affirmations, conversations, etc.

A child who see’s a positive parent creating the life they want.  A parent who values themselves will naturally teach their child the same.  Let your child believe anything is possible.

I can always remember years ago, my son had a tiny spider on him.  I told him it was a money spider and it would bring money to him.  This was actually just an old wives tale I’d been told as a child.  About a week later my son came to me and asked “Mummy, when will my money come?”  I looked at him a little confused and asked “What money?”  He reminded me of the spider and I said “Just be patient, it will come”  I knew at that moment my son was already using the law of attraction in his own life.  Sure enough a few days later he found £20.   There was no-one close by who might have dropped it.  My son kept it and fully assumed it was his money from the spider.

Use little reminders too.  For example – If your child mentions something is bothering him/her then suggest visualizing the outcome, using some affirmations and using EFT.  Teaching your child how to use EFT (Emotional Freedom Techniques) is one of the best things you can do as this teaches your child how to release negative emotions and beliefs for themselves.  Note:  They will need you to do this with them to start.  A great resource to help learn EFT for kids is
http://www.thewizardswish.com 

In my book 21 Steps to Positive Parenting I also share some games that help children (and adults) focus on positive things they want or already have.  One of the steps also focuses on using visual reminders such as vision boards and books, which I highly recommend and children usually love making them.

I hope this helps

Wendy

If you have a question or challenge to ask me then please go to Questions and fill in the form provided.  I will them post a reply here on this blog.

Have a great week.

Does your child know what you want?

8 May

I hear so many parents telling their children what they don’t want but not telling them what they do want.  So I ask today “Does your child know what you want from them?” and more to the point “Do you know what you want from your child?”

“Don’t push your brother when you want the toy he has” focuses on what you don’t want.  Instead try “If your brother has something that you want, ask him in a kind voice if you can play with it.”

Take some time over the next week to write down what is really important to you.  What do you really want from your child?  Then when you’re clear let your child know.

If you find that your child is behaving in a way you don’t like or doing something you don’t like, instead of telling your child to stop – YOU STOP.  Think about what you do want and then calmly tell your child what you want.

Sounds easy doesn’t it?  Well it is, but if you haven’t been doing this then it will take a little effort.  I guarantee you’ll forget from time to time.  I do still now.  As soon as you realize that you’re focusing on any behaviour you don’t want, just STOP and make a shift so that you are focusing again on what you do want.

The law of attraction gives us whatever we focus on the most.

For more law of attraction parenting tips go to 
http://www.wendytomlinsoncoaching.com/21-Steps.html

 

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Getting On With It

17 Apr

Hello Positive Parents,

I apologize for the lack of posts recently.  It’s been a busy time what with school holidays and running my coaching business.  We had a lovely break though.

Well I have to tell you I’m feeling a little bit of a meanie today.  It’s midweek of the first week back to school.  Now my son has had two good days and been full of stories about his days Monday and yesterday, so I know schools going well.  He was late going to sleep last night and this morning he felt rough.

My super soft Mummy side said “Let him stay in bed” but the mum in me who want my son to be the sort of person who really goes for life and doesn’t give into every ache or illness as soon as they poke their nasty heads into his life said”Get up and let’s have a nice breakfast together and see how the day goes”

I sent him off to school and told him to get the medical center to call if he was feeling really bad.

Well midday the medical center called and said they thought it was muscular pain due to the new exercise he’s done the day before in PE.  They are a great school and the medical center staff are brilliant.  I know they are very thorough in dealing with any complaints of illness etc from pupils.  They recommended he stay on at school and have told him to go back if it gets any worse.

No more phone calls and only an hour and a half to go, so that’s good.

I’ve been busy working all afternoon but in the back of my mind I’ve been running images of him looking happy and smiling, enjoying his day.  I’m imagining him getting into the car when I collect him and him telling me about something good that happened during the day.

Worrying about him will do absolutely no good at all but sending our positive vibrations could well make the world of difference.

It’s straight to Granny’s for something yummy to eat and then I’ve made sure I’ve got the rest of the evening for whatever he wants to do.  Playing who wants to be a millionaire and Monopoly are most likely to be on the agenda or snuggling up for a film night.

Then it will be early to bed for both of us tonight I think.

Hope you’re all having a great week.

Remember to look out for and praise that behaviour you want. 

 

Happy Parenting

 

 

 

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All for Parent and Kids

3 Apr

Hello Positive Parents,

Well I’ve been busy working on my website, I felt it had started to get a bit cluttered.  Hopefully you’ll be able to find the information relevant to you quickly and easily now.

My Parents and Kids Pages are all together now where you can find services I provide, resources,etc.  I’ll be adding more resources as and when I get some extra time and I’ll add some articles too. Click Here

Well it’s school holidays which I love.  JM’s gone for a sleepover at his friends and no doubt he’ll want to have a sleepover here too over the next week.  I’m really hoping that the weather with improve a bit more next week.  We’ve had beautiful clear blue sky here in Lincolnshire (UK) today but it’s still very cold.

We’re hoping for some days out next week and some nice weather always helps.

My law of attraction parenting tip for the week is Let it be.

I’m sitting in my living room typing this blog post and as I look around the room it looks complete chaos to the untrained eye.  However to a Practicing Positive Parent it’s fun.  The tents up and for some reason the sleeping bags have crept out of the tent and are spread across the floor, lego hero figures are on standby and there’s piles of books and games ready for enjoying.  I contemplated packing it all away as my son is away for the night.  But then I thought of how much he loved setting it up and how great he’ll feel coming home to it tomorrow.

Tent fun

Tent fun

I’m letting it be rather than following my first instinct which was to tidy it away.  When I ask myself  ”Do I want a tidy house where everything is put away or a happy house and seeing my son’s face light up when he see’s his tent still out when he gets home tomorrow? For me there was no question about what was going to happen.  I’ve let it be and tomorrow I will see the rewards in my son’s face.

Happy Parenting

Enjoy your week.

Wendy x

 

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Positive Parents Don’t Judge Other Parents.

27 Mar

Hello Positive Parents,

Well if you follow me on Facebook on my Positive Parenting Page, you’ll know I had to have a little bit of a rant this week.  It was about parents being judgmental towards other parents.

I believe that all children and all parents are different.  Most of us want the best for our children and most of us are trying our best.  If you’re anything like me then you won’t get it right all of the time and you’ll understand that we are all learning as our children grow.

"Side Pose Of Boy Watching Tv" by imagerymajestic

“Side Pose Of Boy Watching Tv” by imagerymajestic

I certainly don’t buy into the idea that to be a perfect parent you must parent a certain way or do certain things.  Anyway I don’t believe that there is such a thing as a perfect parent and we shouldn’t aim for this.  Just be the perfect parent for your child.

If you’ve ever been at the wrong end of another parents judging then you’ll know it’s not nice.

Positive parents don’t judge other parents, they support them and offer friendship or just a genuine smile.  Now I’d like to say that I’ve never in my life been judgmental but I can’t.   I still do it now from time to time but then I stop and think.

As I said before, we all have different ideas and I’d really like other parents to respect each other.

My rant on Facebook was actually because of a forum post about children having TV in their bedrooms.  Now I fully appreciate that some parents don’t want their children to have TV in their rooms and have strong beliefs about this subject.  Personally my son (11) has a TV in his room although he hardly ever uses it.  He prefers to watch TV in our family room and whilst we all enjoy TV and especially films it is not the only entertainment in our family life.

The thing that concerned me was the lack of respect for other parents beliefs and some of the parents who didn’t allow TV in bedrooms were actually very rude and judgmental about those parents who thought it was okay.

Personally I love my son watching TV and films.  He’s very interested in how films are made and at 11 years of age, he has the whole world at his feet.  He may well be  a film producer or write scripts for TV etc.  I like my child to have lots of opportunity to explore the things he likes.

He understands that too much TV isn’t a good idea and he understands that there are things I don’t want him to watch.  I take care to explain why and I feel we have a very happy balance.

I like to allow my son (with a little guidance) to make positive choices for himself rather than banning things from his life.  However this is my style of parenting and it works for us.  My sister has different ideas to me and whilst we are very similar we respect each others differences, especially when it comes to parenting.

So I ask you all to please ditch judging other parents and focus on being the best parent you can be whilst showing support and kindness to other parents.

Share your thoughts please.

Happy Parenting.

Wendy

 

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This is brilliant

13 Mar

Hey Positive Parents,

I hope you’re having a great week.  Well I hadn’t really planned on posting today but I was browsing Pintrest and came across something I absolutely loved, so of course I wanted to share it with you all.

I often talk about allowing emotions and I think this is a fantastic way to get kids to acknowledge anger and deal with it in a super positive way.  Brilliant

Please go to Anger Map and share with others

Well as I said, I hadn’t planned on posting today so I’m keeping it short.  Happy Parenting

source: google.com via Wendy on Pinterest

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